Boy was I mistaken! After having dozens of these conversations I have come to conclude a few things as their success relates to my journey.
They don’t know what I don’t know
Firstly the irony in this statement is really comical. Its so paradoxical that I can almost get lost in the loop, but let me explain. I’m not where I think I need or ought to be. So I find others who appear to be and ask them about their secrets to success. if willing, they tell me their ideas and maybe, if I ask really nicely, they will even tell me their secret sauce. Then I leave with this new information wondering if applying their secret sauce will get me to the next level. So I apply it. Cold turkey. I just wholesale apply it. Why? Because I have nothing to loose. I am not yet where I think I should be.
This has about the same statistical probability of success as gambling in Vegas. Its a total crap shoot. Yet, because it is unfamiliar to me and holds the promise of potential, I try.
The irony here is not just that I don’t know if this is a solution to my problem, they don’t know if its a solution to my problem either and so are essentially just flattered that I would ask.
I don’t know what I don’t know
The next layer is very similar to the first, but it just takes the strangeness of the behavior to a new level.
The idea that I might miraculously discover the key to my success by interacting with someone else’s success, has an element of sanity in it, but only if I know what my challenge is. If I don’t, I’m just stabbing in the dark. Groping for something to hold onto and committed to trying anything that emerges. Again this feels like Vegas and my confidence level is not very high. There is however a redemptive lining to this ironic cloud. It is the possibility that by seeing someone else’s success and understanding how they got there, I might discover a weakness or challenge in my own plan and once repaired, be that much closer to success. Potentially.
Hope is the real commodity
I think perhaps the real substance in the conversation here is hope. That’s is possibly what I am really after when I come to talk with you about my challenges. In my heart I know you can’t prescribe my solution. I know that you could not see all my challenges. But what you can give me is encouragement. What you can give me is an inspirational story of how you got from here to there. What you can give me is the remarkable story of a pioneering individual who was willing to face the unnamed beast and conquered. If you will give me that, then I will leave having somehow come closer to my destiny and found myself a step closer to my answer.
So tell me your story, and don’t leave anything out!